The character of Titus Pullo in the HBO series “ROME” has gained a great deal of popularity with those who watched the series, not only because of his direct and reckless behaviour and his love for women of all kinds, but also because of his verbal caprioles, his direct, plebeian tongue.

His role in this series about a serious and bloody period in Roman history puts a smile on your face. Yet, Pullo often is the victim of a sad sort of Fortune. This has also given him the nickname of “Poor Pullo” on many occasions, but the hero of the Thirteenth Legion always seeks and finds the Silver Lining.

In this book we have gathered all his monickers, the evidences of Pullo’s partcular view on Roman life in his day and age. And what’s more, we even managed to catch them in his very own language, a very special and particular sort of Latin, the tongue of the Great Pleb himself.

Have your fill of Pullo’s wisdom, enjoy being with him in a camp prison in Gaul, on patrol with his old accomplice Lucius Vorenus in the Cadurci Lands, in a Roman bar or harlot house, at home in his private corner of Vorenus’ insula, inside Cleopatra’s caravan, down the Cloaca drain or at life’s very bottom end in Erastes Fulmen’s party and, finally, holding hands with the love of his life Eirene.

Wherever you go there’s Pullo to take with you. He will take you by the hand and wander with you to show you his Roman World. We surely hope it will be a pleasant journey!

Tanaquil Sergius

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CHAPTER I: PULLO IN GAUL

Is that it? I was just beginning to enjoy myself.

Translation: Itane res se habet? Modo hoc delectari incipiebam.

Forculus! If you be the right god for the business here, I call on you to help. If you will open this door, then I will kill for you a fine white lamb. Or failing that, If I can’t find a good one for a decent price, then, say, six pigeons. This, Forculus, I vow to you…

Translation: Forcule! Si tu es ipse deus ad rem, te imploro. Si ianuam hanc aperies, bonum album agnum tibi occidam. Si autem fallo, si bonum agnum medio pretio invenire non potero, tunc tibi dono....dic, sex turtures. Forcule, id votum tibi solvam…

You ride well, almost as well as me…..almost as well as me, sir. Me, I’m a natural. My father was an Ubian probably.

Translation: Bene equitas. Me prope aequas..... Me prope aequas, domine. Ego ad equos natus sum. Veri simile est pater meus Ubius fuisse.

Listen, sir, thank you for taking me on this job. Noble way to make amends. For getting me into this cac by calling me names. I won’t forget. Titus Pullo never forgets a favor.

Translation: Ehi, domine, gratias tibi ago me partem mandati facienti. Recte iniuriam redemisti. Quia me increpuisti atque me in cacam iniecisti. Immo, numquam obliturus sum. T. Pullo numquam operae praebitae obliviscitur.

Thirteenth never fails, eh?

Translation: XIII legio numquam fallit, annon?

If I’m dead already then, sir, you should take care how you speak to me. I’ve got nothing to lose. What’s to stop me cutting you into little gobs, and riding off, eh? What’s to stop me, sir

Translation: Si iam mortuus sum, domine, verba tua caveas! Damni nihil facio quod te frusta conseco et fugio. Eh? Damni nihil facio!

Me, I have simple tastes. I like to kill my enemy, take their gold and enjoy their women. Why tie yourself to one? Where’s the flavour? Where’s the joy?

Translation: Sapor mihi simplex est. Hostes occidere, aurum eorum auferre, feminis eorum frui mihi placet. Quare una femina contentus esse? Ubi sapor, ubi gaudium?

Look here, Mars! Look here, Mars! I am Titus Pullo. And these bloody men, my gift to you!

Translation: Adsis, Mars! Ecce, Mars! Sum Titus Pullo! Hi cruenti viri tibi dati sunt a me!

Fine way for a slave to talk. You won’t get far with a mouth like that on you.

Translation: Numquid optimus modus dicendi servo est? Talis bucca te procul non feret.

Three hours away from a wife he hasn’t seen in eight years. The man’s terrified. Terrified. What if she’s lost her teeth? What if she’s gotten skinny? What if she’s been letting other men get between her legs and…..

Translation: Tres horas abest ab uxore VIII annos non visa. Mortis metus eum capit. Mortis metus! Quid ad eam omnes dentes perditam? Quid si strigosa facta est? Quid si alios viros inter crures accepit et...

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So far so good for the first chapter. These are not the entire chapter's quotations, but some are explicit and although Titus Pullo is a good man at heart, he can be quite explicit in his tongue, too explicit for this site sometimes, but in the booklet I am making of these specimina of Pullo's wisdom, they will certainly be included, plus an attached sticker in English and Latin, saying that this nice booklet contains some explicit content....*s*.