Now seriously, when's the last time this place been dusted? You've got all lords and ladies but where's the bartenders around here? Guess this means I have to make the drinks. *getting out my book on drinks*

"Who wants a scotch on the rocks? Since scotch and manufactured ice haven't really been invented yet, anybody want an actual Scottsmen on hot coals? That might be close!"

Thank you for the invite. I'm happy to help in any way I Can.