Date: Mar 26, 2003 - 00:49
Mitch, Sara, James, and Diane were happy to be finished with their senior year of college, and to celebrate they planned a day of fun and adventure at Ideal Lake. Little did they know what lay in wait for them in this seemingly idyllic location. As they drove along the mountain highway towards the lake, they laughed and joked about the trick they were going to play on Tom and Laura who were meeting them at the lake later in the day. The theme song to 'The Little Shop of Horrors' accompanied their idle chatter and added a bizarre touch of the surreal to the day's activity. The foursome could not help but sing along with the catchy tune as their car made it's way through the bends of the road. As singing songs made them thirsty - they stopped the car to open the trunk and retrieve some cold beer. When what to their eyes would appear, but something completely unexpected.
"Damn!" exclaimed Mitch, "all the beer cans have been punctured!"
"Very funny, buddy." Jim said, giving his friend a sour look.
Mitch replied, "seriously, look!", and to Jim's amazement all 48 cans had been pierced and now lay empty while a pool of booze formed in the back of the trunk. With the trunk wide open, the way was clear for spore #57P/Ramma Lamma Ding Dang B to fall from the passing meteorite into the pool of brew. Unbeknownst to the puzzled four who juggled unconvincing explanations, the little spore began to grow. Until it was so large the trunk could contain it any longer.
At the sight of this, Sara and Diane took off running towards the woods.
Jim quickly backed away from the swelling mass but, ever the curious one, Mitch leaned in to take a closer look.
"ARRRGGGHHH!" screamed Mitch as two slimy green tentacles leaped from the mass and wrapped around his head and neck. Jim was frozen in terror as he watched one tentacle go in Mitchs' nose and the other one, wrapped around Mitchs' head, start to reach out for him. But, as fast as he tried to get away he found himself with the tentacle in his own nose and even shooting out his eyes.
I have a bad feeling about this, Jim thought to himself as the tentacle began to tickle his tonsils. And then when it reached his stomach it was more than he could take.
Sara and Dianne, feeling foolish for having run into the woods at the sight of the growing blob in the trunk of the car, had returned to the edge of the road and were amazed to see Mitch and James sitting behind the empty trunk of the car with eerie, hollow blank expressions on their faces.
Sara whispered to Dianne, "I can't believe they didn't come looking for us, this is another one of their stupid jokes". "But, something is askew as they certainly do look er, ah, different!"
As if on cue, the two young men began to move towards them.
It's amazing the uncanny instinct ladies have in perilous situations for as soon as Sara and Dianne saw Mitch and James jerkily walking toward them with vacant expressions on their faces, they quickly turned and fled back into the woods without even saying a word to each other. Unaware of the horrors that were transpiring near Ideal Lake, Tom and Laure finally were on the road and enroute.
With Tom at the wheel, gearstick in hand, the red Bugatti hugged the hairpin bends of the mountainous road. When they turned the corner they spotted their friends car parked alongside the road.
"Whoa" said Tom, "Just what have we here?" Laura, busily occupied in adding one last coat of ReVamp No. 5 to her toe nails, looked up in surprise. Without her glasses, it looked like their friends had been filling the trunk of their car with greenery, illegally pruned from the surrounding forest. Tom slowly edged his car to the edge of the road while Laura reached for her glasses in the back seat. Pushing her designer specs up the bridge of her nose, she twisted back and the scene swam into focus.
Mitch and James had completely absorbed the invading organism, and the matter now branching away from their finger tips and toe ends, extruding in fact from their several bodily cavities, looked to Laura's expertly mascaraed eyes with their now twenty-twentied vision exactly like dancing firs. "But it's too soon for Christmas!" - she considered, reasonably. "And way to late for Halloween!" - she said thoughtfully.
Tom, who has great vision without the aid of glasses, could not believe what was wriggling out of the the bodies of Mitch and James.
"Honey, it might be time..." He whispered in a low hoarse voice reaching out to grab Laura's hand, "...to ditch the stilettos and run like hell!" As Tom and Laura bounced from their car, they noticed off in the wooded distance, the waving arms and screams of the girls - Sara and Diane.
Laura, for once giving in to pure, unadulterated logic instead of hysterics reminded Tom that both had a vastly better chance of removing themselves from the scene by bouncing back INTO their car and decamping in the 100mph-in-30-seconds take off the Bugatti was justly famous for. And, glancing at Sara and Dianne - who were, for once, downright hysterical - Laura purred the other crucial reminder: "Remember, Sugar, we NEVER pick up hitch-hikers".
As they rounded the next corner as if like magic a hitchhiker appeared and without a single explanation to Laura, Tom pulled over as if to offer him a ride. In a flash, and without saying a word, Laura reached over, slipped the gear shift into 1st and stomped her stiletto heal into Tom's foot on the accelerator causing the Bugatti to leap forward, spewing gravel and fishtailing down the road. She looked over at him and screamed, "What, the heck are you thinking, Tom...pull it together, man!"
Trying to steer the car one-handed and adjust his rear vision mirror at the same time so he could view the stumbling figure behind them, Tom said primly, "I don't like the way you spoke to me just then, Laura."
"Oh, I'm so sorry," Laura said sarcastically, "I didn't mean to offend your tender sensibilities but we're in the middle of a frigging crisis."
"Well, if we are in the middle of such a flipping crisis and you choose not to trust my driving or my judgement - do you want to drive?"
"Oh, for heaven's sake!!...just drive, you twit!"
